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22 Feb 10 How to Destroy Irrational Fears
Irrational fears plague a lot of us. We know they are irrational, when we are not faced with them, we try to rationalise them away, count the ways in which they are completely irrational. Intellectually we get: we’re being completely irrational, the fear itself shouldn’t be there, because it is stupid in the first place.
In a situation where we know we might face our fear, we might again try to rationalise it away, or pump ourselves up so that we are prepared to deal with the fear and overcome it.
But once we are in that situation, the fear is there again, as strong as it ever was.
There is a good reason for this: you can’t pump yourself up out of an irrational fear. And most of all, you can’t rationalise it away, because it is irrational. Rationality and intellectual responses to emotional, irrational reactions are ineffectual.
The only way to deal with and eventually destroy irrational fears is to face them, repeatedly. If you have a mortal fear of heights, go sky diving, jump from every high trampoline at every swimming pool you can find, learn wall- or mountain climbing. If you have anxiety about talking to strangers, go out and say hi to everyone you see, strike up conversations in every elevator and make situational observations to others in every store/bank queue you stand in.
Irrational fears are as their name implies, irrational. You can only crush them by repeatedly demonstrating to yourself that no actual bodily harm will come to you when you are exposed to your fear. To destroy your fear, you must face it, feel it and expose yourself to it so frequently that the feeling of fear numbs away.
There really is no shortcut, no rationalising, no pumping yourself up - the only solution is to face your fears head on until you have conquered them.
